I would go down on you faster than GM stock
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
Randomize
