She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
Randomize
