my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
