I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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