Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
