The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
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