In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
