you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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