just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
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