Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
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