Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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