Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize
