For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
