How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
