I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
