he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Randomize