i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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