I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
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