That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Randomize
