You kept calling me your small dog last night.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
Randomize
