Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
then he tried to convert me to islam
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Randomize
