i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
Randomize
