One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
ugly people sure do ruin things
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
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