I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
Randomize