So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
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