ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I have demons in me.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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