they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
