So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize