Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
Randomize
