i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
