i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
Randomize
