we're blogging at a bar
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Randomize
