More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
Randomize
