Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize