those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
i caught a guy at work today stealing condoms. i let him go when i realized that they were extra small.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
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