your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
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