i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Randomize