Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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