problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
