Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
Randomize
