Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
there's paper in my vomit.
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
