How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
I'm passing your future prison.
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
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