i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
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