just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
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