ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
Randomize
