You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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