i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
