Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
Randomize