At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
Randomize
