You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I have feelings that need drinking.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
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